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too much stress

143/101. Dr is worried about my BP again.

My resting heart rate is 81. Running yesterday very early I hit 170: not very good. I stayed at 160-165 for most of the run - which was supposed to be an easy one. Probably a good thing I haven't started doing interval training - whatever 90% of my aerobic max is, I don't think it's over 170 as my "aerobic" rate was supposed to be 155 about 5 years ago. Going to be measuring my BP twice a day for the next week and reporting back to the doctor on how it looks. Sad that I've lost weight and am exercising three times a week and I'm still way over 1 90 diastolic; it's nothing but stress. Ah, social exclusion, you are real and even though you are only in my head, when I notice you there you really get to me. And, you know, everything else. Not really sure how to deal with everything else.

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