Web Cowgirl 衛 思 維 (webcowgirl) wrote,
Web Cowgirl 衛 思 維

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My mind is an oasis, to drink from as you please

I am, as they say, "rough" today. I'm feeling very weepy and things are upsetting me easily. It's the first time I can really remember having this kind of stuff affect me while I was at work. I nearly burst into tears when my boss's boss asked me why I wasn't going to go to the company Christmas party - a sure sign that not going is the right thing to do.

I'm disturbed that I'm falling apart right at the time where my three month probation is taking place. I'm not really looking like someone who is handling working here all that well. I'm sure after our release Tuesday things will lighten up, but between the pressure here (I get to work tomorrow, yay) and my ongoing bad on the brain from Wednesday, today is a Really Bad Day. I should have taken some Xanax to break the bad dialogue in my head, then I could have focused on the work stuff more successfully.

Wow. Today marks exactly three months since I moved here. I guess my anticipation that it would be six months before I started feeling level was not overly pessimistic. I must, must remember to go to Pilates Monday, and I ought to see if I can start going a second time a week.
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