Why is this? Because tonight I went and saw Venus and Adonis, which was a poem read out loud with guitar accompaniment and beautiful Bunraku puppets acting it out. It was just gorgeous and lush and fantastic and generally perfect and I loved it. Er, and so I don't have to go tomorrow.
That said, before the show I got on some downer kick about how shadowdaddy's life would go so much easier if I just kind of kicked the bucket in the next few years (yes, the heart shit is freaking me out a bit), and neither of us felt like going out after the show, even though we were fairly near King's Cross and according to some article I read this week about retirement I should be good to live until almost 100 (if you add 10 years to my maternal grandmother's age of death, even though my mom didn't even make it to 55), though it was counteracted (in my head) by another article I read that said extreme stress can cause physical damage to the heart. Maybe I screwed mine up over the last two years. Maybe we aren't meant to go through the crap with the extreme adrenaline rushes that last for months at a time. I mean, think about it, a widower with a house of his own in Seattle ... he'd be a hot commodity.
On Tuesday I'm supposed to go in and get a 24 hour heart monitor to try and figure out what is going on, but the appointment time is the same time as the rescheduled early morning thing I'm supposed to do at work (from this past Tuesday) and I'm not sure what to do. I guess I am an old person, and it's good I'm at home now, and am planning on spending tomorrow night at home, albeit in the company of people who's presence I enjoy.
And my knee's still hurting, I think because of walking into work Wednesday. Joy.