Web Cowgirl 衛 思 維 (webcowgirl) wrote,
Web Cowgirl 衛 思 維

A bit about work

Work is fucked up right now. The good news is we finally got pay rises: the union beat back the managements 0% and now we're getting 2.5%, backdated to July. (I think this is important information to share; I hope nobody thinks I'm gloating. Frankly a raise below inflation is not really that good.)

The bad news is that we're in this state where people are now applying for their jobs and the tension is ... bleah. All of the people who requested redundancy or early retirement have been told whether or not they can get it. In once case, three people in three positions -> 2 all asked to leave, but only one got to; in another, all three people want to stay, but only one will get to. One of my guys wants to leave but he only can if I can find someone else to backfill him - and I'm only allowed to choose from the pool of people who want to stay but have had their jobs taken away from them. Where there's competition, everyone has to interview: in other cases, people are being forced to stay against their will (as it were, with 500K people supposedly coming on the market in the next year it's the worst time ever to be job hunting even with severance); in my case, I will feel pressured to hire someone who may actually really not want the job I'm interviewing him for in order to free up someone I know really wants to (and needs to, for their mental health) get off the merry-go-round. No pressure here. I promise to be the best boss ever, but that just may not be enough.

Nobody on my team went for the promotion positions that opened up. That makes me sad. I would like, for once in my life, to spend time grooming an employee and actually see the benefits of that, not just think "oh this really might work if only ..." Is what I'm doing actually working? I don't have proof of it yet. All of these years of being a manager and never once have I seen someone get a promotion.

Oh yeah. And nobody's focused on work. Is this a surprise to you? I managed to skate through it without having to tell anyone "you ain't got a job anymore" but now I'm going to have to do interviews anyway. Bah. Bleah. Yuck.

ACK in other news Spem Et Alium at Cadogan Hall tonight with Robin was really nice. Also, I'm feeling a lot less like pulling a Mary Wollstonecraft than I have been in the last week. I kind of think it might be a hormonal thing but I'm okay with that and fortunately I've been carefully trained to not prod too hard into apparent mental health lest I upset the precarious balance. But if I don't get something good going for Christmas, I can easily see this world-covering blackness returning. The logic that ran me for the last week has deep roots in despair and the feeling of worthlessness I've struggled with my whole life; if it rears its head again, I won't do a good job of resisting the hypno-rays shining from its reptilian eyes.

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