January 7th, 2012


Life in the new year

After a smashing week, my US trip ended quite badly as my best friend decided to lay into me on our way to the airport, saying if I wanted to come again I needed to bring my drivers licence and rent my own car and go sit in the back where the passengers sit. This meant we had two hours of stony silence on the drive to the airport. I can't believe she still has such a bad temper and feels like it's okay to treat an adult the way she treated me given how hard I've been working to get away from people who are abusive this year. And I can't imagine going back there now and I see no reason to have her come out now. It's sad: instead of coming home all up on life and ready to deal with the challenges of this year, I was sent off feeling ... shit on, really.

Then it was a nightmare journey back to London: forced to put 6 pounds of extra stuff into my carryon at 5 AM ,a brief nap on my 6 AM flight then 10 hours in O'Hare with no possible flight to get me home any earlier. I took a one hour nap on a bench at the airport, bought some chocolate, got a massage, and killed time on the WiFi. Once I got on the plane (at 5 PM), I had two Xanax and a melatonin and basically dropped off of the planet.

Back to London, in my flat around 10. The week was a blur. Wechsler frog-marched me around Tooting Common the day I arrived: I took the next day as WFH and managed to get to the Dulwich Picture Gallery to see the Group of 7 exhibit with visiting American friend Robin. Josh made me dinner and laughed as I fell asleep on his couch afterwards (but loved the Vosges chocolate I'd brought him). I got to see Robin again the next night while off to see Howl's Moving Castle (dull even at 70 minutes) and had a lovely dinner with very intelligent game designing people afterward.

Meanwhile work was a nightmare of too many things and too little time , highlighted by pissy boss boss telling me no way would I get a bonus if I left before April 2.  Then my date for my sunny January escape disappeared; it just all seems too much stress for me now. I am tempted to quit early and just be done. I don't care anymore.

Then there was a date with a 92% match off OKCupid (and INTJ to boot), and a really fun night at Guys and Dolls withBooklectic, and then suddenly I've made it past the first week of the year and am in Brighton with eglantinedreams having an evening that passes for what normal people does. What the hell is this crazy life I'm living? What is going to happen in the new year?