March 24th, 2013

Sea dragon

Sunday morning in Crystal Palace

Day 2 in a row of having breakfast with Jason ... nice! He's pulling out the stops with French toast and sausages, using things from Borough Market. It's hard to get motivated to do much of anything today given that it's below freezing outside but there will be more Flamenco tonight and a nap this afternoon. Maybe we'll get back to working on planning his housewarming party - Saturday April 13th is looking like the perfect evening.


Thanks to a well-timed disco nap, I was able to manage both an afternoon Flamenco trip and the Vauxhall/Tradescant road line dance party yesterday. The dance event was in a converted church, and I showed up with my vegetarian chile while J brought cornbread (as it was also a potluck). I did about two dances out of three (as my energy levels and strength are building) but J and I were the source of AMAZEMENT as we knew how to do a grapevine and a chain - crazy to be "leaders" in a dance group but all of that Ceilidh-ing did come in handy. And he looked very handsome and was sweet about not spinning me too fast as I am still getting dizzy easily.


We called it done around 10:30 and spent the long bus ride back talking about his life over the last 2 years and it was all pretty informative and insightful ... crazy to be learning so much new stuff about each other but it's kind of fun. And just maybe, when my health picks up, we'll try for the swing dance class in Brixton.

Sea dragon

Naming, shaming, and victim-blaming

A lot is being written about the Adria Richards Twitter/Pycon thing this week, and I'll add this: boy, I can't just say if it's my experience as a woman, but I will say that when I have publicly called out people for bad behavior I have MASSIVELY been shut down and cut off. I really don't understand why the attitude is to blame the victim instead of the perp but people have got to learn to stop taking the attitude that a woman complaining about other people being awful is a bitch and start looking at what exactly is going on and addressing it directly. I don't understand why men are allowed to get away with stuff the way they do but the code of silencing really has a lot to blame for enabling rapists, child molesters, sexual harassers, and all-purpose assholes not being called to account for their behavior. Treat your partner (or ex-partner) like shit in private? You get a FREE RIDE because if she complains about it, she's a bitch, or "airing her dirty laundry," or what have you. And my experience is that men will treat their next partner (or victim) the same way because they CAN get away with it.

I have filed both bullying and sexual harassment claims at various jobs, and in both cases, I was the one who had to quit.

It's time this stops.

Another fun flamenco evening

Had a very good evening at my second to last Flamenco show of the season. Israel Galvan is really something. I imagined him as focused on his art as the most excellent of lovers, so dedicated to achieving some great idea in his head and exploring that he has no sense of shame or ego - he was just totally in the moment.

Also, of course, the evening was great because of the company of the wonderful dreamsewing, who, as ever, gave me insights on life as we caught up and chatted about pretty much every little thing except the show we'd just seen. She is just such a pleasure to be around - I always feel lucky when I can get to see her. We've made plans for me to come visit in April and she's going to see Jordi Savall with me in June ... I am pleased!

And now hurrying to bed so I can try to grab one of the day appointments with the specialist - need to call the clinic right at 8 AM if I'm going to have any luck being seen in the morning. I have a can not miss meeting at work at 12:10, so that's my deadline.