The scene: a fancy cooking show
Host: This fantastic pie is really a combination of all of the favorite Thanksgiving flavors! How did you ever think to combine maple and dark Karo syrup in your chocolate pecan pie recipe?
Our Heroine (attempts modesty): It really seemed like just a natural blend, don't you agree?
A flashback to that horrible night two Thanksgiving eves before
Our Heroine (holding a dripping, yet clearly empty bottle over a cup measure): Three quarters of a cup? THREE quarters of a cup? How am I supposed to make three quarters of a freaking pie! Jesus f*bleeped* *as this is a family show*t, what am I supposed to do now? I need to get this damned thing in the oven! Shit!
Uh, yeah, so through some miracle I had a second bottle in the cabinet - don't know how or why, but I'm sure this is much better than making it onto some cooking show. Thirty minutes to make the pie, that was pretty good. Now, onto the stuffing.